RENITA.
its 4 am..i can't sleep so i started fooling around on diaryland. I really didn't plan on updating...i was gonna just catch up on some reads and for some reason i logged into pebbies' diary just for the hell of it..which i've been blocked from since our fight..and oddly i was unblocked.
we've been typing to each other recently..its weird. anthony made me apologize. so i did. i missed her. yes i missed you. the whole fight was stupid..but i swear to god the aol lady TOLD ME U DID THAT! i really didn't freakin' assume..she told me you reported me. either way we both blew it way out of proportion.
i tried to not care since it was "just aol" but it mattered. guess the kiddo really wormed her way into my heart cuz i missed her like crazy but we are both stubborn as hell..dude...its damn near been a year since the fight and we're JUST starting to be polite again..thats crazy...it was the silliest pettiest fighti n the world..and we almost went a year before we were adult enough to just BE POLITE! how immature is that.
i feel like an ass.
i didn't really read much of her diary..bc i knew if i did i'd wanna read everything and catch up and then i'd be up hella late and i've got class tommorrow..midterms actually. and i need to wake up early to write a paper and a speech i'm too lazy to write tonight.
aww man...this weekend was great though, i had THE most fun i've had in a long time. I had a fashion show friday night that went really well, then to celebrate i went partying with AJ..whom i've yet to mention in here..but we just recently made up too..i'll type about her later..and the 2 gay boys..anthony and ron..aj ditched us but i went to the mens' gay club with them and had a BLAST! i got totally wasted which isnt' too cool...the next day i was sick as hell...but i had soo much fun..i'm going back..it was like heaven..me surrounded by beautiful men..everything i've ever dreamed it to be they were all ooo'in and ahh'in over me..fussin' over me.. i made so many new friends. It was great.
ummm...the next day old man came over..i'm dating a 41 year old. we've been "beefin" for the past couple of weeks..i told my mom i was dating him and she flipped but didn't flip..it was weird..she like said he's tryna trap me..get me to drop out of school..and preggie...all this crazy mess but she didn't say not to date him..just told me to date other people too so i dont get too caught up..its like she encourages me to be a loosey goosey and encourages a non-manogomy attitude. its weird. i told her while i was lyin in the hospital bed..she was like "and where is he now! he aint next to u while ur in the hospital making sure ur ok" dude..i didn't even tlel him i was there..and as soon as she said that he called on the otherline...my roommate told him wherei was..and the first thing he said was " which hospital..i'm on my way" so HA! right in yo face mommy! lol..but really..he's cool..we're just friends...chillin'..nothing serious..oh...we were fighting though because we started gettin "close" he was damn near over my apt everyday and i got scared...i kept runnin making up excuses y we can't date all linking to the 19 year age gap..and he finally got sick of hearing my accusatory bullshit..so he left me alone..just like i wanted. freakin' smarty pants...but we made up..i like him a lot.but its nothing serious from my end..i'm just exploring and having fun..i think he wants a relationship buti'm SOO not interested..aggy was enough. we went to new orleans to see a football game, and he took me to tennessee to meet his mom...his younger sister is a midget with breasts implants and does tina turner impersonations for a living. she's so beautiful and freakin' hilarious. but we'll get back to him later..aggy hates me. i feel awful..i love him..i do...but this is the right thing. we can't be together right now..i'm not right for him right now. i'm not right for him period i don't think. miss him though...
umm gg..is a bitch. she's a lying..manipulative loser ass bitch..but thats another story too...i had to curse her out and men are dumb.
umm anything else?
i think i like tanner..he's cool folx
we're gonna hang out when i come home
i'm excited
tanner and malik..the funniest boys i know minus aggy...i cant' freakin' wait
man malik and i have gotten to be pretty darn tight...i love the shit outta that boy...he is SOOO funny!! i swear he's like one of the few people who i'd really consider a friend.
i can't stand any of my " real life" friends anymore..but malik has turned into that...
he came to visit me down here and stayed with me for a week..but i'll talk about that another day too...
everybody thinks he and i are fucking but we really aren't
he's really like a brother to me...we just have hella lotta fun together. tanner and malik and i are supposed to get phaded..and go to the movies and throw ice at people and go play pool somewhere...woohoo!
have i met any interesting people lately?
dang i can't think..so much has happened and i update so little...
i made the dean's list last semester 4.0
this semester dropped..i have a 3.8 still on the dean's list but i didnt' make the 4.0 cuz of all the days i missed when i was sick. i skipped my colonoscopy like an idiot. i got scared man..i'm sorry just aint nobody stickin shit up my anus.
i refuse!! i'll live with my fucked up belly but they're not stickin shit in me.
NO WAY JOSE!
ulcer schmulcer. i believe i dont have an ulcer..and my gettin sick was a fluke..and ima wish it true..so its true.
there i'm all fixed
God fixed me.
anything else?
no..i'm sleepy now
i really should write this speech and paper
o oooooo ooooooooooooooooooh
y did i LOSE my bookbag on thursday
left it on the public bus..the homework i'm doing tonight/this mornin? the speech and paper? they were already done!!my dumb ass dind't save it..but they had been done!!
then of course i lose my backpack..which of course contained my credit cards, check card, checks, an extra id, my social security card, the car registrations, and insurance cards...my account which held a positive 700 dollars..now has a MINUS 500...and the bag was lost on thursday..since i'm a slacker and partied all weekend..i had no reason to look for my bookbag and didn't notice it was lost until 2 am monday. GREAT JOB
i cant' even call the banks yet.
i'm FUCKEd...its the 2nd time i've lost my wallet since i've been in atlanta.
i'm not tellin my mom.she'll shit a brick.
i'll just work a 2nd job during my break and recoup my loss...hopefully the bank will give me something back..good thing this isnt' bank of america account again...or else they may think its fraud on my behalf..i'm SUCH a dumbass...too much on the brain
i'm stressed..i need a vacation but i dont wanna go home.
i'm coming home..but i dont wanna.
anyway...i'm gonna write this speech cuz i know i wont wake up tommorrow and do it.
cya later!
2003-12-16/4:34 a.m.